Dear Dot:
Today has been a testimonial day. Not mine, but a testimony from our daughter, Peggy, who has learned and continues to practice a remarkable thing. As old as I am, I have not learned what she has learned through hard work, failures, and much, much practice. She has learned to hear herself think and adjust what she is thinking by plain effort. And she can do that because she wills it, and she wills it because it keeps her in the arms of God. And in the arms of God is right where she desires to be.
It is a huge privilege to have her with us at this time. I want to learn what she has learned. I want to be able to put myself in the arms of God.
First, it is only fair to tell you that Peg was at one time married and has three children by that marriage. Today, she has a great relationship with each of the three and is a good friend to and with her ex-husband and his new wife. She went to school and became a Registered Nurse when she was in her 40's and now works in a Trauma Center in a prominent MN hospital where she has seen many lives find hope and some only despair. She has counseled many of those who have been burdened with drugs or alcohol, and has become what I would call a woman of great beauty, both physically and spiritually.
Back to today, early afternoon----I read Luke 13:23b. "Put your mind on your life with God. The way to life--to God--is vigorous and requires your total attention." That doesn't sound very hard, does it? Ha! I wrote a bit about what I needed to do to put my mind on my life with God in my journal.
I really needed to do this, because a lot of old tapes are getting played back here in MN, and I'm not doing a very good job listening to them. I find myself judging myself, and sometimes Jerry. So, I took this Luke passage seriously. I corralled both Peg and Jerry and read my questioning heart to them and said, "Is this what I should be doing to be solid in life with God?" And I listed some things I thought might help me, like 1)Don't blame others; 2)Ask God to help me sort out what is happening, 3)Say the Lord's prayer 4)Rest in a quiet corner 5)Seek God immediately. And then I asked, "Will these things help me connect right away to God?"
Peg said of course they would help, but the bigger thing is to make certain I am willing to find out what God tells me Himself as He is the great teacher. And what He might tell me is the important thing to accept. And as important, that He is the judge...not me. Every time I decide I am in the wrong or someone else is in the wrong, I am judging. And that's God's job, and Only God's.
Therefore, it's not so important who's wrong, as being wrong doesn't make us BAD, but what we are thinking is the important factor. By figuring out what we are thinking, it helps us to discover what it is that we need to turn over to God. Is it Judging? Is it Ego? Is it Fear? And has Anger accompanied the problem?
So, here I am...trying now to get these thoughts on paper and even more so, in my BRAIN and in my HEART!
I am very thankful that my daughter has become grown-up in God and is willing to help me grow up, too. I want to grow up in God and have the peace of God so engrained in my heart that the world can see Him through my eyes and my life.
Please pray for me, as I will pray for you.
Everlasting friend, now from MN, Jo
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