As a path crossed the main track which they had been following, The Shepherd said quietly, "This is the path which you are now to follow." So, they turned their backs on the High Places, coming to the edge of the desert, and found themselves on the shore of a great sea. Then the Shepherd said, "Now is the time for me to leave you, Much Afraid, and return to the mountains. Remember, I can cross the desert sands swiftly as I can leap from the high Places to the valleys, so whenever you should call to me I will hear. Whenever you are willing to obey me, and are following the path of my choice, you will always be able to hear and recognize my voice, and when you hear it you must always obey. Remember also that it is always safe to obey my voice, even if it seems to call you to paths which look impossible or even crazy." Then, he blessed her and went from them.
The three of them, Much Afraid with her two companions, walked along the shores of the great sea for many days, and at first it seemed to her that up until then she had never known real loneliness. All of her old friends lived far away behind her. The mountains were out of sight, and nothing in the whole wide world but the endless desert on one side and the endless sea moaning on the other. Nothing grew there, not even grass. Nothing lived but sea gulls crying overhead and crabs scuttling across the sand. Much-Afraid, during those days, never let go of the hands of her two companions and it forever amazed her how swiftly they helped her along. It also surprised her that she could walk more upright than ever before and with scarcely a limp. And even more surprising,, she realized the furnaces and grinding stones she had seen much earlier, somehow enabled her to accept the knowledge within herself that a gulf had opened between herself and her past life. She did not quite understand how it happened. She still did not feel like a 'Royal' and certainly did not as yet look it, nevertheless, she had been stamped with 'the mark', and would never be the same again. Therefore she did not go through her days with Sorrow and Suffering by her side cringingly or complaining. Gradually, something impossible seemed to be happening. She was finding a new kind of joy springing up in her heart, and she found herself noticing beauty in the landscape around her, earlier not so beautiful. And she found herself laughing at the crabs scuttling by. Even the sea became a thing of beauty with the light gleaming on the curve of green breakers and the foaming spray under a horizon blue as a midnight sky. And she remembered something else she had learned, "When he has tried me, I shall come forth as gold. Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning."
One day, resting on the shore with high cliffs above and great rocks scattered about, Much-Afraid found herself looking down into a lonely little cove completely closed on three sides by the cliffs and nothing in it but driftwood and stranded seaweed. She thought it looked lonely in its emptiness. Before they left their resting place, she looked at the cove again. It was now filled with great waves roaring and laughing, pouring themselves through the narrow inlet and leaping against the sides, taking possession of every empty niche and crevice. And it was there that Much-Afraid built her third altar. "O my Lord," she cried, "I thank you for leading me her. Behold me empty as was this little cove but waiting your time to be filled to the brim with the flood-tide of Love." She picked up a little piece of quartz and crystal which had laid on the cliffside and dropped it among the other memorial stones she carried in her little bag.
Meanwhile, Pride and the rest of the Fear Family had not given up, and sent out spies who brought back news that Much-Afraid was on the shores of the Sea of Loneliness, a different direction once again. It was decided that Resentment, Bitterness, and Self-Pity (with Pride following in case they should make a mistake) should hurry off and bring back Much-Afraid. But this time, their taunts and horrid suggestions had less effect. But, Self-Pity threw one last remark. "It really seems as though the one you follow takes delight in making you suffer and leaving you to be misunderstood, for every time you yield to him he thinks up some new way of wounding and bruising you." That was a mistake! Much-Afraid, remembering the importance of accepting our "bruising" just as corn is bruised in the making of bread, she actually picked up a piece of rock and hurled it right at the head of Self-Pity much to his dismayed astonishment.
Yet, it is exhausting to be assaulted day by day with nasty suggestions. So, one day when her women companions were sleeping she wandered off alone for a while. When she reached the end of her promontory, she stood there and looked out to sea in wonder, but after a moment realized her four enemies were slowly approaching. Putting her back to a great rock, she prepared to resist them to the limit of her strength, the place too narrow for all four to approach together. But Pride, putting himself in front stepped toward her holding a strong cudgel.
Much-Afraid lifted her face to the empty sky and with all her strength called out to the Lord! "Come, My Lord, and make no tarrying." And to the horror of the four ruffians, there was the Shepherd himself. The first three threw themselves to the ground and edged away. But Pride had just seized a hold on Much-Afraid. Then, catching him by the shoulders, the Shepherd spun Pride around lifting him in the air, where he uttered a loud shriek, and then dropped him over the edge of the cliff into the sea.
Much-Afraid asked the Shepherd why she couldn't get away from them without his help, as it was troubling to her. His answer was clear. "I think, that lately the way seemed a little easier for you. And the sun shone and you could finally rest. You just forgot for a while that you were still my little handmaiden, Acceptance-with-Joy, and thought you were ready to go up to the High Places. When you wear the weed of impatience, you will always find your enemies get an advantage over you."
Her voice, suddenly very weak, said, "Oh." And she blushed, saying, "You choose, my Shepherd, and it is my joy to hear and follow." The Shepherd, smiling, gave her another stone to put into her memorial bag, a remembrance of the day Pride took a fall. (More tomorrow, God willing!)
I hope you are enjoying this story of Much-Afraid. I am enjoying writing the synopsis of the story. Thank you, Hannah Hurnard, for the original, probably still available at a Christian bookstore.
Watch out for Pride; he's a bad one!
Jo INMN
No comments:
Post a Comment